I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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