i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
