Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
