I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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