after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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