if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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