His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
ttyl tear gas
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
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