Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I understand Curling. That high.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
