i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize