brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize