Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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