Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
