You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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