i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
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stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
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Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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