im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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