Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
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