He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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