Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
