More tranny stories later!
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
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