That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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