just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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