And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
