Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize