this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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