: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
