It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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