Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
What drink are we having for lunch?
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
