The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I could fuck to npr.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
