Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
