she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
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Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
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On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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