I bet he comes in French.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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