accomplished twins. life is a go
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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