Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize