Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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