Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize