yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
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