Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Semen is not good for contacts.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
