Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
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I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
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Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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