Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
