i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
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