She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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