It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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