woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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