he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize