ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
