I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
So here I am, sexting at work.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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