i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
