My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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