She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Terrible idea I love it
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I am mentally ready for anal.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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