So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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