Quick, to the slutcave!
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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