Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
